Hawaiian Holiday

                            

The last week of June we headed off to Kauai for an adults only vacation and it was unbelievable. We had been talking about doing a trip like this for a long time and it had been a sure thing for a year... but no amount of preparation time would have made it easy for me. I had a ton of anxiety over leaving the girls, especially Gwena and agonized over whether I should bring her along with us or not. I felt really guilty about quitting nursing but knew it wouldn't be a true vacation trying to entertain a baby all day at the beach. Plus in order to get there cheaper we were driving all night to Vegas and I was dreading the travel days with my little pip.  I thought for awhile I'd take my pump along with me and try to keep up my supply but within a couple weeks of us leaving, Gwena started being less and less interested in nursing and they stopped being the sweet, quiet sessions I had been loving. So that definitely helped me make my decision to leave her and it was the right one. 

We had such an awesome time and were completely relaxed. We missed the girls but they did amazingly well and were in phenomenal hands. My awesome friend Lindsay watched them and took them to do all kinds of fun things everyday, kept them all completely happy and on a schedule, built them fabulous A-frame tents, and kept us updated on everything that was going on. We missed our girls far more than they missed us. It made us a little sad to not have them with us to play in the sand and splash in the waves. But it was a much needed break and so liberating to be able to be away and not feeling guilty or rushing back home or worried that they weren't on their best behavior. As soon as we were on the plane, I didn't worry about a thing. I regret that I spent an entire six months racked with anxiety over leaving the girls and laying awake at night writing instructions in my head to Lindsay for ridiculous things like "how to make a cheese roll-up". Everything went perfectly and it was good for all of us. I also wish I had been a little more laid back as far as spending money once we were there and let Ben eat to his hearts content. He deserved a week of complete freedom. Oh well...maybe next time. :)

Ben and I took a long lay over in Oahu on the way to Kauai and toured Pearl Harbor which was awesome and walked Waikiki beach. Once we were all together with my family we spent the week laying at the beach, reading, swimming in the ocean and pool, paddle boarding, and late night hot tubbing. We went on runs and walks on the golf course and went on a long and very muddy hike to Secret Beach on the Napali Coast where my mom almost died. We went to church and toured their awesome community garden, saw The Fault in Our Stars, watched World Cup games, and shopped around spouting horn. We ate a lot of meals at Dukes, enjoyed Puka dogs, and many orders of delicious malasadas (fried dough). 

It was so nice to just be myself and to enjoy Ben and my siblings and parents, especially my little brother and Rachel who had flown over from Texas. No nursing, no nap and bed times to keep or meals to plan or snacks to pack or anyone to take care of besides myself...in such a gorgeous setting.  It was truly blissful.