Happy Moms

 “During my professional career as a doctor of medicine, I was occasionally asked why I chose to do that difficult work. I responded with my opinion that the highest and noblest work in this life is that of a mother. Since that option was not available to me, I thought that caring for the sick might come close. I tried to care for my patients as compassionately and competently as my mother cared for me.
Many years ago the First Presidency issued a statement that has had a profound and lasting influence upon me. “Motherhood,” they wrote, “is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels.”
Russell M. Nelson, 


And so, my dear young women, with all my heart I urge you not to look to contemporary culture for your role models and mentors. Please look to your faithful mothers for a pattern to follow. Model yourselves after them, not after celebrities whose standards are not the Lord’s standards and whose values may not reflect an eternal perspective. Look to your mother. Learn from her strengths, her courage, and her faithfulness. Listen to her. She may not be a whiz at texting; she may not even have a Facebook page. But when it comes to matters of the heart and the things of the Lord, she has a wealth of knowledge…No other person on earth loves you in the same way or is willing to sacrifice as much to encourage you and help you find happiness—in this life and forever.
M. Russell Ballard

May I say to mothers collectively, in the name of the Lord, you are magnificent. Rely on your Father in Heaven. Rely on Him heavily. Rely on Him forever. And “press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope.” You are doing God’s work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you and He will bless you, even—no, especially—when your days and your nights may be the most challenging.”
Elder Jeffery R. Holland


May each of us treasure this truth: One cannot forget mother and remember God. One cannot remember mother and forget God. Why? Because these two sacred persons, God and mother are partners in creation, in love, in sacrifice, in service, they are as one.
President Thomas S Monson

Last Wednesday for Activity Days we had a mother/daughter dessert night and I used the above quotes as talking points. I thought they were worth sharing. We also played a guessing game where I read answers to questions I had collected from the mothers. The girls had to figure out when I was spotlighting their mom. Then we passed out the gifts the girls made and each mother/daughter stood up and said something that they love about each other. It was a really nice evening. Lots of the girls said things about their moms making food for them or reading to them or doing their laundry. Two responses from the eight year old girls included:  "I love my mom because she is always so cheery" and "I love hearing my mom laugh."

These two little sentences and a conversation I had with one of my dear friends that afternoon about the stresses of motherhood have been spinning in my head this weekend.

I hit a rough patch this winter. I wasn't a very happy mother. I spent a lot of time crying, worrying, complaining and just feeling down. I feel like a totally different person than I was a few months ago. I am happy. And this I realize is a gift to myself and to my children (and to Ben no doubt).

I grew up in a happy home with a happy mother. I have such fond memories of specific times being with my mom when she was laughing so hard she couldn't catch her breath and had tears running down her cheeks. In San Francisco making fun of my dad and his too tight shoes, sitting next to her on an airplane taking some very close up pictures, and dumping popcorn all over each other in the movie Where the Heart Is. Happiness. Even now, I can't think of many things that bring me more comfort than calling my mom and hearing her stories and her laugh. Thank you Mom.

I think there are few gifts that you can give your children that are better than just being happy. When moms are happy, it spreads throughout the house. Happy moms create happy kids who feel more safe and secure in their world.

As moms we are drilled with pressures, stresses, and guilt. Things we should be doing with our kids, things we should be teaching our kids, places they should be going, classes they should be enrolled in. We want to give our children everything. But I think being a happy, "cheery" mom trumps them all. Of course we should be bending over backwards for our kids. Of course our world should revolve around them. Motherhood by trade, is going to come with a truckload of self sacrifice. But don't forget about doing the things that make you happy. Seek out those things and make time for them. Figure out the things that really weigh you down or stress you out and if you can, reduce or eliminate them. Just be happy. For you, for your husband, for your children.

I spent 11 glorious hours in bed Saturday night and woke up this morning to chocolates on the kitchen table and a garden of flowers all set up outside ready to be planted. Including three little lilac bushes. :) Thank you to my Ben for being so good to me all day and always.

After weeks of close to perfect church behavior and a very sweet, snugly weekend, Rosie and Evie were particularly monstrous today. They don't perform well under pressure, I suppose. But I am sure thankful for them. Here is my sweet Evie, hoarding all the bears and babies that she can possibly get her hands on. And my silly Rose, trying on clothes she fishes out of bins from the laundry room. When I found her she was trying to put on one of her daddies socks. Oh they are dear. 

We met up for a movie night with some great friends later that evening. Being able to put the girls to bed at other peoples houses gives me the sense of some fabulous freedom we haven't had for a while. All in all, it was a wonderful Mothers Day.