Resolutions

I have been putting off this post. Whenever I think of the resolutions I made last year the only ones that pop into my mind are potty training and IVF-- both of which were attempted but so far unsuccessful. They will be moved on into resolutions for this year and that is a little discouraging. But after reviewing, I realize there were some goals that were made and met and others that were certainly improved on. I can be happy enough with that.

Here are the resolutions I made for 2012. 

• Continue our improved scripture study routine: DONE. I must say that as far as scripture study goes, this year has been one of my best yet. I was a part of a GET FIT challenge with some friends and it involved spiritual and physical challenges. I read my scriptures or other church related material every day for 12 weeks straight and came in 2nd place. It was so good for me and came at the perfect time. We finished the challenge right around Thanksgiving and that is when I found out I wasn't pregnant. I was really grateful that I had really worked on my relationship with my Father in Heaven because I think that gave me a perspective and comfort I really needed. I didn't have to search for it when the hurt came because it was already there.
• Get to the DENVER temple: DONE.
• Stay for the entire 3 hour block of church rather than switching off taking the girls home to nap: DONE. With morning church and having the girls in nursery, church was wonderful. 
• Find 5 new recipes good enough to include in the dinner rotation: Not quite. I haven't been cooking very much lately and when I do I tend to stick to our favorites... but I did add a few I can think of: Calazones, Cilantro Lime Chicken, Black Bean Enchiladas.
• Eat fruits or veggies at EVERY meal: Nope. Still needs work.
• Wash my face EVERY night: Nope. Washed my face far more than the year before but not every night.
• Do IVF again this year to grow our family: We did but it didn't take. :(
• Have date night twice a month: Hmmmm No. But we did go out much more than the year before.
• Landscape the backyard. Plant a garden.: DONE.
• Attempt potty training my two angels: Kind of. We started on New Years Eve. We still have a long way to go.
• Work with Rosie and Evie every morning during breakfast on new words rather than waiting till bed when everyone is tired: Not every morning but we have done a lot of work together and the girls are definitely progressing. 
• Get rid of Rosie's binky in the near future: DONE. Rosie was a champ. 
• Continue to do some sort of workout video, gym, or long walk every day: Not every day but most days. We are so grateful for our very affordable, amazing gym right up the street and are there 4-5 days a week.  Ran my first half marathon which was an unplanned but awesome accomplishment this year. 
• Go into the gym two mornings a week before work (ben): Not in the morning but in the evenings and played basketball with the ward on Tuesdays and Thursdays. He just got signed up to play on a league which is very exciting.
• Continue enjoying the little things, treasuring Rosie and Evie, and making trips to SLC: DONE.
• Don't sweat the small stuff and be patient with my girls: DONE (to the best of my abilities).
• Try new restaurants: We could do this better but we did try to be more adventuresome this year.
•  Find new fun things or mini vacations around Colorado: DONE.   

 I have brainstorming resolutions for the upcoming year and haven't come up with anything huge. I think I'm nervous to be too ambitious because there were a lot of goals from last year I still need to work on. I hate not meeting my goals but I sure do love setting them.

1.  Get my dumplings completely potty trained but in a non stressed, positive manner. 
2.  Attempt IVF again and either become pregnant OR run another half marathon. Both good things.
3.  BE HAPPY and take life as it comes and know there is a time and a season for all things. Don't worry about what you can't control. Get through the winter without turning into a zombie and getting depressed.
4. Finish Rosemary and Evelyn's book and get the photos organized on the computer.
5. Continue good habits of scripture study, family prayer, personal prayer, and family home evening.
6. Attend more full sessions at the Temple whether as a couple or individually.
7. Continue to go to the gym at least 3 times a week, work out, and be healthy.
8. Eat more fruits and veggies.
9. Again, try new recipes to add to the dinner rotation.
10. Magnify my calling and be happy doing it.  
11.  Attempt to decrease the time spent on my phone in the presence of my children and husband. It's obnoxious.
12. Get comfortable and try new things with the awesome new camera Ben got me for Christmas.
13. Continue reading other good literature. Before I joined my bookclub it was taking me forever to get through a book because it was always the last thing on my list to do. I have loved making it a higher priority and always having a story to come back to everyday.
14. STOP complaining. Replace with gratitude. There is certainly a time and  a place and "VENTING" is perfectly ok. But I do a lot of random complaining as a source of humor or to be conversational.  People may be under the impression that I'm not crazy about my husband or my perfect little girls or my life when just the opposite is true.
15. Spend more time on the floor engaging in focused play with my Eve and Rose. They are at such a fun age and love to pretend. I want to be a part of their imaginary world as much as I can.

And that's that. Here's to another wonderful year of attempted resolutions.

The last two weeks in photos:

Happy New Year

 I feel completely unmotivated to blog. We've been working on potty training and it takes it out of me. It also means that when nap time finally rolls around, not only am I more tired than usual but the house is much messier. Rather than getting out and doing activities or running errands or keeping on top of it throughout the morning, I have been completely focused on chasing these crazy girls and trying to anticipate every dribble of pee. (which in Rosie's case is seriously about 10 times an hour or in Evie's case about 1 every 3 hours...very different girls) and allowing the house to get destroyed. Ugh.


 It is getting better. We started on Monday and I'm glad we did because Ben was home to undergo the roughest day. Tuesday we pretty much bagged because when Evie woke up she couldn't put any weight on her right foot and couldn't walk. Walking takes precedent over being a big girl. We took her to Urgent Care to get x-rays and they were clear. We think she pulled a muscle or had a cold settle in her hip. But Wednesday came and she was fine and we started again. I've decided to just take it half days at a time or even just 3-4 hours at a time. It helps me stay positive and is less overwhelming for all of us. I don't have it in me to go all day. It may be a little confusing to switch back and forth and may end up taking longer but for now this is all I can muster. Today we had no accidents from 8:45-12 and decided to quit while we are ahead.
 
We had a wonderful time ringing in the New Year with some great friends and were very grateful for a much needed escape from the potty training torture prison.

Reviewing 2012:

January:
Ben and I celebrated our birthdays and passed the stomach flu around. Rosie and Evie turned 18 months old and could FINALLY go to nursery which was awesome. I was surprised to read that at this point Rosie was the quieter and shyer of the two but that has definitely changed.  Nowadays, Evie still does quite a bit of babbling especially when she is lost in her imaginary play but Rosie has zoomed ahead with decipherable language and is more comfortable socializing. These girls change every day.


February:
We went to Salt Lake and spent much of the week up in Park City with the family. The girls came home with colds and ear infections. This was not a good month for Rosie. She burned her tiny ear on my flat iron earlier in the month and then later got pneumonia and was admitted to the hospital for a very long 4 days.
 

March:
February took it out of me and I got depressed. I was in a winter rut and didn't really climb out of it until my parents came in town for a quick visit. Learned the importance of taking mommy breaks, sunshine, and exercise. Longingly awaiting spring.

April: 
We went to SLC for Easter and had such a great trip. We spent much of the time outside playing in the sunshine. Ben re-landscaped the back yard and got rid of all the gravel, laid sod, and built a fire pit and planter boxes. Superman. I started running.

May: 
We went on an awesome trip to Steamboat Springs with Ben's family and started getting good use out of our hiking backpacks. Ben's parents and Cindy and Chris stayed and played back at home for a couple days and Daniel and Becca joined us too. I had PRK done to fix my eyes which has been an awesome blessing. Ben and I ran the BolderBOULDER over Memorial Day.



June: 
My wonderful friends Elizabeth, Shawna, Kim, and Suzanna came and visited for a fun filled weekend. I flew out to Salt Lake for one night to surprise my dad for his 60th birthday and had a blast. Our gorgeous girls turned 2 years old!


July: 
One of my dearest friends Tami came for a visit. Celebrated the 4th of July with family and friends. Sand, surf, and sun at Newport Beach. Great runs. Disneyland. Partied hard the rest of the month in Salt Lake. Celebrated Pioneer Day and ran my first half marathon with my big sis.


August: 
Watched the Olympics every chance we got. Sucked up every last second of summer.


September:
We celebrated Labor Day and a blue-moon weekend up in Estes Park. Great time of the year to go. We had Ben's family in town to welcome his little brother home from his mission and had a great time. I went to Time Out For Women with some gals and made some new friends and loved it. My little bro flew in for about 24 hours for a med school interview and it was so fun to hang out with him. We welcomed fall with a trip up to Squaw Pass.


October:
We celebrated our 5 year anniversary by going to Red Rocks for a Jason Mraz concert in the rain and then later in the month met up with my family to see some plays at the Shakespeare Festival. Then our little family went on to Zion for some unbelievable hiking. We started taking meds for our IVF cycle. We did a lot of raking in the back yard and spent many a morning at the pumpkin patch. My parents came in for a quick fun visit on their way home from Winter Quarters. We got a bad case of the croup but still had a great Halloween with our ladybugs.


November:
We went to SLC for IVF. The whole process went much better than expected but didn't result in success. :( Ben's family came in town right after for Thanksgiving and it was great to have them here.


December: 
We had a busy and festive holiday season in Colorado and it was just what I needed. It was so much fun celebrating with two 2 year olds and all the magic that brings. We went to Salt Lake (for the fifth time this year.....I know) and had a wonderful holiday.

This was a very time consuming post but so fun to write. I went back and read just about everything from the past year and am so overwhelmed by what an amazing 12 months we have had. I am so lucky to have such  a great, supportive husband, two perfect girls, and so many fun times together. We are so lucky to have such wonderful family and to have gotten to see so much of them this year. I'm so grateful for our good friends here, the ones we get to see so often in Salt Lake, and the ones we miss but stay in touch with. We had an amazing year filled with lots of joy and many blessings. 

Resolutions to come.

A Holly Jolly Christmas

Got home late last night from our Christmas trip to Salt Lake and we had a wonderful time. The holidays really came and went this year and it makes me sad that Rosie and Evie have to wait for a whole year before Santa will come again. Christmas was better than ever this year watching them enjoy it so.
 
The Saturday before Chrismas we went on a sleigh ride with the whole family up at the Homestead. We  ended up at Santas house for a visit and cookies. Evie was a bit of a stinker on the sleigh and refused to go anywhere near the Santa but we still had a good time.

Christmas Eve brought tons of beautiful white snow which was fabulous. I can't remember the last time we truly had a perfectly timed white Christmas. We drove around running last minute Christmas errands and then packed up our gift bags to bring to the homeless downtown. This is my favorite Christmas tradition. We came home and left milk and cookies out for Santa and then were off to bed. Unfortunately poor Ben got really sick the night before and it slowly spread throughout the family. Sweet Evie threw up quite a bit that night but was right as rain for opening gifts the next morning.

Christmas morning was super fun watching the girls open their gifts and anyone else's they could get their little paws on. They made out like bandits as per usual. They got clothes and lots of new food for their new kitchen, zoobie pets, a darling Little People Nativity, super fun bandaids, and a lovely cloth alphabet set from their auntie. They also got big girl pants to start potty training because Rosie said that is what she wanted Santa to bring her. We started today and it is truly a nightmare. Not for the faint of heart.

 Later that day we went out and attempted to build a snowman in the front yard but it wasn't packing very well and also went sledding down the hill in the side yard. We came in for a delicious Christmas feast that people couldn't eat much of because everyone was feeling a little under the weather. I however never ended up getting sick and  regretfully (not really) ate my fill all week long.

The rest of the week the girls mostly just played with their cousins who they cannot get enough of. They played cowgirls, jumped from couch to couch, had movie parties, and chased each other all over the house. Grandma is a very good sport for all that goes on and all that gets broken. We took them to the McDonalds Play Place and witnessed an epic and hilarious brawl between Ava, Evie, and Ella which needs to be remembered. We also all went to Les Mis together which was awesome.

We unfortunately didn't see too many friends because it is such a busy, family week for everyone. We did get together with my favorite girls in the world from high school and went down to Lehi to catch up with some wonderful girls I went to New Zealand with for study abroad.
We had a wonderful holiday.

Christmas Crunch Time

I just got on my blog after several fun, Christmas filled days and realized in my flurry to get out the door that I never even posted this from last Friday, the 21rst. Oh well, better late than never. 

 

Christmas is four days away and we have been busy, busy, busy getting ready for it. I have been slaving away making almond roca for neighbors and friends and getting advice from my mom every other second on how to get it just right. I made about 10 batches and I would say only 3-4 actually turned out perfect. Ugh. It's tricky. The girls also loved frosting sugar cookies.

We spent an evening out to see Santa at the Bass Pro Shop where they have all kinds of Christmas activities, an aquarium, a merry-go-round, and lots of fun for kids. It was a good time but a very long night. I was worried about Evie being too scared to sit on Santas lap after hours of waiting around. She was all smiles and assurances that she was going to until we were about a foot away from the cute little Santa and she backed out. My sweet shy girl. This will do. She was ok with the moral support from her daddy and sister.

Ben and I went on a Christmas date in downtown Denver and had a wonderful, romantic time out to dinner and ice skating.

We had a mini Colorado Christmas yesterday so that we wouldn't have to cart all the bigger stuff to SLC. We got amazing deals on a little toy kitchen and new push trikes for the girls. We also opened lovely presents from Grandpa and Grandma M which the girls have been throughly enjoying. We ate Christmas coffee cake and then Ben had to head to work. Santa also brought a freezing cold day and a snow storm which was very festive. We were glad it came when it did instead of when we make our big drive.

I was a little foolish to volunteer to have bookclub at our house the night before we left town which added some extra stress to an already  packed week but it turned out well and was a lot of fun. We read Little Women this month and I have absolutely loved it. It's the perfect December read and really added to my Christmas cheer the last couple weeks.
Now we are rushing around throwing everything together to make our journey to SLC tonight. Just a few more things to do before Ben gets home and then off we go.

Check out Christmas in Colorado 2011 and 2012. What a difference a year makes. Merry Christmas!

Wake Up

Monday morning started off slow. The start of another long week. Evie was in a bad mood and was doing a lot of crying and whining for no apparent reason. I just couldn't get my act together and sat down when breakfast was done to read reviews on amazon for some Christmas presents I have my eye on. The Today show was on in the background. Rosie and Evie were playing with their toy farm on the floor at my feet and were having squabble after squabble over the plastic chicken. I broke the fight up a couple times but then went into my tune out mode where I pretend that I'm not there (not effective...but a survival mechanism).

 The chicken fight escalated and Evie ran to me in sobs. I was in the middle of reading something (and in my tune out mode)so at first I didn't even look up. That sounds so cruel (and I guess it is) but when every other second of my life involves someone bursting into tears, sometimes I don't jump as quickly as I should. After a moment I reached for her and pulled her up next to me and offered some comfort and asked her what happened while rubbing her back. My eyes were still on the computer screen however. Evie knows when she isn't getting your undivided attention and that's just not going to fly. She literally slapped me across the face and slammed the lap top closed on my hands and screamed "Go Away Mommy!!".  Evie is a little confused on the meaning of that phrase and uses it when she wants something- another song before bed time, another cracker in the car, or just some undivided attention. It means: "Hello!!!??? I'm here! Don't ignore me!".

My first reaction was to scold her and haul her off to time out for hitting me in the face. But this time I didn't. She was wrong to do that but absolutely right in wanting my attention and for me to do my job. Just to love her and be there for her and protect her from the wiles and whims of her sister.  WAKE UP.

That same afternoon we went on a long walk to have lunch at the park and enjoy the beautiful sunny 65 degree weather. When we got home I was on the phone with Ben for a few minutes. Once off I turned to see Rosie galloping into the room in nothing but her shirt screaming that she wanted some candy. I said no to the candy and asked her where her clothes were. She dragged me into the bathroom to show me she had used her mini potty ALL BY HERSELF with no prompting from me and managed to get her coat, shoes, socks, pants, and diaper off in the matter of seconds. She will do just about anything if she knows candy may be a reward. Ben has been telling me to potty train for the last few months. I keep putting it off and saying the girls aren't ready. Uh....wake up. I think it's just me who's not ready.

Yesterday I was at the gym doing a oh-so-hard-as-of-late 3 mile run. I got off the treadmill and went to refill my water bottle and saw a mom by the play area crouched down talking to her darling little girl. The girl had a big smile on her face and I got pang of jealousy and then sadness. I want another baby! I want more moments like that. One beat later I realized how ridiculous that jealousy and sadness was. I have TWO beautiful, amazing little girls who were right down the hall in the childcare waiting for me to come get them. WAKE UP and appreciate what you have now because it is sooooo good. Dwelling on this baby hunger is only making me miss moments with my babies...the ones who are here and still need me and provide a endless supply of sweet moments. I just to need to be awake.

Here's to being better about that. 

I received so many nice text messages, blog comments, calls, and emails in regards to our failed IVF attempt. In truth, I'm doing just fine but I really appreciate all the concern. I'm lucky to have such good friends and family. I'm excited for February but really enjoying being drug free and focusing on other things.
My acupuncturist recommended some supplements to take and to go gluten free the next couple months which she thinks should help our success rates. I'll try anything and I like feeling like I'm doing something proactive.

What else have we been up to...We had the perfect morning last Saturday, taking turns in the temple and then going to IKEA for lunch and browsing. We also made and painted some salt dough ornaments to counteract the quickly disappearing ornaments from our tree that have either been smuggled away somewhere or broken. 

We also have loved having this sweet puppy around. Eve and Rose  love walking him around the house on his leash and singing him to sleep. He's quite darling but I'm glad he goes home and these two stay. 

  

 We have been enjoying night walks to look at the lights and reading books by the Christmas tree. I love this time of year. I sat down to blog while I took the unnecessary step of toasting a tray of almonds to make my moms famous almond roca (gluten free, mind you) but totally spaced setting the timer and just charred them all to a crisp. errrrgh. wake up.